I’d tentatively designated February as the month of gratitude, but after hearing from a couple of other mothers and starting the book The Fourth Trimester, I’m pretty sure I’m going to change my focus to “rest.”
I have a hard time with rest. I’m a great napper, but I typically use it as a tool to improve my productivity. I’m addicted to productivity. My mom told me that as a young child I would walk outside in the morning, hands on hips, looking as though I was taking account of what plans I had in store for the day. Now, if I feel like I’ve wasted time or let the day slip by without getting something accomplished, I feel uneasy. Once baby comes, that just isn’t going to work.
I’ve been reading about the designated period of rest that new mothers are expected to take in cultures across the world – so different from our culture where decent maternity leave is hard to come by, and new mothers are rewarded for “bouncing back” quickly.
My post-birth situation will definitely have its pros and cons. I just completed a temporary work position, so I am currently unemployed and will have no source of income. My husband will continue to work (no leave), but his employer is allowing him to work from home most days for an as yet undetermined amount of time. We are fortunate to be getting financial help from my family during the time that I am not working. This means no (outside) pressure to go back to work until I am ready, even though I know I’ll start to put pressure on myself after a while.
So my goal for February will be to listen to my body and rest.
I will use this time to bond with my husband and our son. I will move when it feels right to move. I will be still when it feels right to be still. I will try not to worry about what comes next. I will rest and enjoy my family.
A Year of Experimentation 